Love downstairs(01 of08)
Open Image ModalMr Carson and Mrs Hughes need to just get on with it. They've dilly-dallied around each other for five whole series, they've held hands in the sand, they nearly bought a house together and now, finally, FINALLY, Mr Carson has seen the light and put a ring on it. Come on folks, let's have a Downton wedding that doesn't end in tragedy, being arrested for murder or being abandoned at the aisle. It's just time.
Decisions, decisions...(02 of08)
Open Image ModalLady Mary, choose already! Ever since the eldest girl eventually emerged from the Havisham-esque veil of gloom after losing her husband to the promise of co-starring with Ben Stiller, sorry I mean motoring tragedy, she's been a right fickle minx, playing with the emotions of not one but two suitors, and even booking a hotel room to err… test the merchandise before making a purchase. Come on Mary, you've had your fun, now it's time to secure the house and the name - there must be another surprise cousin waiting to rock up to the annual fair, and stoke the fire within the iceberg, surely?
In From The Cold(03 of08)
Open Image ModalThat married editor gentle-chap needs to come back from the dead, and save Lady Mousey Middle One from a life of independence with her recently reclaimed child. With or without a 'tingling' down below. We're not fussy.
Get With The(se) Times(04 of08)
Open Image ModalIf ever there was a character overdue some romance, it's surely the tragic Mr Barrow. Yes, he's still a bit mischievous, conniving and controlling, but the love of a good man could curb that. Ever since his passion for Jimmy took the better of him and he was swiftly despatched, his lot has been reduced to prowling the corridors looking for secrets. Downton might not be able to race ahead to a time of gay marriage (despite the Dowager STILL on her feet in 2014, no doubt), but at least some romance, surely…
As Sinitta Sang, I Need A Toyboy(05 of08)
Open Image ModalCountess Dowager needs to find herself a toyboy (who may or may not resemble George Clooney). Enough of the quivering, courtly Russian, she needs a proper bold toe-tapper to bring her into the roaring 20s so she can finally found out what a weekend is.
Doctor In The House(06 of08)
Open Image ModalMeanwhile, Mrs Crawley needs to see what's humming right under her nose, and marry that good doctor so they can be happy, and worthy, ever after.
Not-So-Ditzy Daisy(07 of08)
Open Image ModalDaisy needs to run for Parliament - on a radical, left-wing manifesto to protect the workers and reclaim all that land and money that her former masters have been sitting on. I mean, when has that ever gone wrong?
Trading Places(08 of08)
Open Image ModalEarl Grantham and his wife need to stop furrowing their brows over the diminishing family fortunes, simply pop the keys to the Downton Abbey back through the letter box, start making the sandwiches in the National Trust coffee shop on the corner of their estate and then retire to to the Everglades, where Americans can ask Robert if he knows the Queen.