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Caitlyn Jenner Reveals She Contemplated Suicide In 'I Am Cait' Episode

Caitlyn Jenner On How She Nearly Took Her Own Life
Ashley Percival

Caitlyn Jenner has opened up about how she contemplated suicide over her gender identity torment.

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The ‘Keeping Up With The Kardashians’ star revealed once thought about shooting herself while living as Bruce Jenner.

Caitlyn makes the emotional admission in scenes to be broadcast in her new documentary series, ‘I Am Cait’, which will document her transition.

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Caitlyn Jenner

She said: "I've been in some dark places, I have been in my house with a gun and said, 'Let's just end it right there, no more pain, no more suffering, that struggle, it's real and I've been there."

The first episode of the eight-part series will also see her mother Esther coming to terms with her son becoming a woman.

According to The Mirror, Esther broke down in tears and she discussed with Caitlyn how difficult she has found it.

"It's going to be so difficult for me to think of you as she, and say Caitlyn when I want to speak with you, or call your attention, 'Hey Caitlyn' instead of, 'Hey Bruce,'” she said.

“You look so much like someone in my family and I was trying to figure it out, it's not easy, it's not easy.

“But your values are always going to be the same, Bruce will still be there, you have the same soul, you have the same soul as you were born with.

“I love Bruce, it will never change. Its going to take some getting used to, I want to do what he wants.

“The problem before with you and I, I'm guessing this, is that you felt uncomfortable with me, we would see each other and it was like you wanted to get away.”

Caitlyn replied: “I was an isolationist, I isolated myself from the world because I didn't fit in, I was kind of stuck in the middle. Caitlyn fits into society better than Bruce.

“I'm very optimistic about the future and I’m dragging you along with me.”

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Caitlyn introduced herself to the world earlier this year

E! recently previewed the series with a new trailer, where Caitlyn could be seen playing tennis, joking that she now understood “why girls need a sports bra”.

‘I Am Cait’ debuts on E! on Sunday 26 July.

If you've been affected by the issues in this article, please call the Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90.

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Caitlyn Jenner Makes Her Debut On Vanity Fair(01 of10)
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On June 1, 2015, Caitlyn Jenner (formerly known as Bruce Jenner) made her debut on the cover of Vanity Fair magazine. The issue followed her public interview with Diane Sawyer, in which she spoke openly about her transition and journey. (credit:Vanity Fair)
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In light of recent controversy surrounding McDonald's treatment of the company's employees, one Washington franchise of the fast food chain impressively allowed transgender individuals to use the bathroom that corresponds with their gender identity. The letter read,
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Arin Andrews and Katie Hill warmed hearts around the world last summer with their unique and touching love story. The pair met at a trans support group, after each had begun the transitioning process, and fell in love. (credit:Barcroft Media)
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When Ari South first appeared on "Project Runway" season eight, the designer embodied a different name and different identity. When she returned to "Project Runway All Stars" in October, she was living as her authentic self and blazing through uncharted territory for transgender people both within -- and outside -- the fashion world. (credit:Courtesy of Lifetime)
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In wake of the pervasive climate of fear and violence plaguing LGBT Russians, top Russian lawyer Masha Best came out as both transgender and bisexual in protest of the country's institutionalized homophobia. Best later went on to announce her campaign for the Russian presidency in 2018. Here, Best poses nude in honor of the 2013 Transgender Day of Remembrance. (credit:Masha Best)
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Other states also met these bills with resistance, with one Arizona lawmaker, John Kavanagh, attempting to push through legislation that would prosecute transgender people for using a public restroom if their appearance didn't match the listed gender on their identification. One local new station dubbed this the "Show Me Your Papers Before You Go Potty" bill. The backlash convinced the lawmaker to tone down the language of his bill, and put it on hold until next year. (credit:ASSOCIATED PRESS)
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Domaine Javier, a nursing student at California Baptist University, revealed to the world that she was transgender in an MTV episode of "True Life." The university's response? Accusations of fraud followed by expulsion because Javier had given her gender as female on her admissions application. She went on to sue the institution. (credit:Courtesy of Domaine Javier)

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